Thirty, I really like you but I still have to see other people.

I love to write jokes and that's all I think about.

All men would still really like to own a train set.

How come when you mix water and flour together you get glue...and then you add eggs and sugar and you get cake? Where does the glue go?

Men have better self-images than women. You know what I've never seen in a men's magazine? A makeover.

Natural childbirth scares me. I think before you have natural childbirth you should find out how big the baby is. Three pounds -- natural childbirth. Anything over three pounds -- heroin.

Most turkeys taste better the day after; my mother's tasted better the day before.