My husband gave me a necklace. It's fake. I requested fake. Maybe I'm paranoid, but in this day and age, I don't want something around my neck that's worth more than my head.

Men like to barbecue. Men will cook if danger is involved.

Men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage - they've experienced pain and bought jewelry.

At the end of every year, I add up the time that I have spent on the phone on hold and subtract it from my age. I don't count that time as really living. I spend more and more time on hold each year. By the time I die, I'm going to be quite young.

When men break up they want to remain friends. Why? Why can't they just get lost?

If a man prepares dinner for you and the salad contains three or more types of lettuce, he is serious.

I got kicked out of ballet class because I pulled a groin muscle. It wasn't mine.