Men who listen to classical music tend not to spit.

Some people think having large breasts makes a woman stupid. Actually, it's quite the opposite: a woman having large breasts makes men stupid.

Someday I want to be rich. Some people get so rich they lose all respect for humanity. That's how rich I want to be.

Life is tough enough without having someone kick you from the inside.

My mother is such a lousy cook that Thanksgiving at her house is a time of sorrow.

I want to have children, but my friends scare me. One of my friends told me she was in labor for 36 hours. I don't even want to do anything that feels good for 36 hours.

If a man prepares dinner for you and the salad contains three or more types of lettuce, he is serious.