One of my first office jobs was cleaning the windows on brown envelopes.

All men would still really like to own a train set.

I love to sleep. Do you? Isn't it great? It really is the best of both worlds. You get to be alive and unconscious.

You know the oxygen masks on airplanes? I don't think there's really any oxygen. I think they're just to muffle the screams.

Never take candy from strangers.

Be careful of men who are bald and rich; the arrogance of "rich" usually cancels out the nice of "bald".

Not one man in a beer commercial has a beerbelly.