Happiness is contagious. Be a carrier!!
I should warn you that underneath these clothes I'm wearing boxer shorts and I know how to use them.
Inflation is the crabgrass in your savings.
If you can get someone to laugh with you, they will be more willing to identify with you, listen to you. It parts the waters.
The secret of writing comedy is to know where it's all going, then get ahead of it.
Spring is God's way of saying, 'One more time!'