For Father's Day, my kids always give me a bottle of cologne called English Leather. It's appropriate! To them I always smell like a wallet.

Economists can certainly disappoint you. One said that the economy would turn up by the last quarter. Well, I'm down to mine and it hasn't.

I always wondered why babies spend so much time sucking their thumbs. Then I tasted baby food.

Do you realize that in the past sixty years, the only foreigners the French have been able to drive out are American tourists?

Washington is a place where politicians don't know which way is up and taxes don't know which way is down.

Realists know where they're going. Dreamers have already been there.

Did you ever get to wondering if taxation without representation might have been cheaper?