The best birthdays of all are those that haven't arrived yet.
Did you hear about the woman who sent out 40,000 Valentine Cards doused in perfume and signed, "Guess Who?" She's a divorce lawyer.
A toast to the weapons of war, may they rust in peace.
Live your life so that if someone says 'Be yourself' it's good advice.
Most people would like to be delivered from temptation but would like it to keep in touch.
Life was a lot simpler when what we honored was father and mother rather than all major credit cards.