Do you realize that in the past sixty years, the only foreigners the French have been able to drive out are American tourists?

I understand the big food companies are developing a tearless onion. I think they can do it - after all, they've already given us tasteless bread.

My wife never lies about her age. She just tells everyone she's as old as I am. Then she lies about my age.

Thanks to modern medicine we are no longer forced to endure prolonged pain, disease, discomfort and wealth.

Individuality' is the key to success.

Noise pollution is a relative thing. In a city, it's a jet plane taking off. In a monastery, it's a pen that scratches.

I take my children everywhere, but they always find their way back home.