An economist is someone who knows all the answers to last years' questions.

Do you ever get the feeling that the only reason we have elections is to find out if the polls were right?

To err is human - and to blame it on a computer is even more so.

These detective series on TV always end at precisely the right moment-after the criminal is arrested and before the court turns him loose.

I remember when humor was gentle pokes. I used to call it 'arm around the shoulder' humor. Now they go for the jugular and they take no prisoners. It's mean, mean stuff.

The secret of writing comedy is to know where it's all going, then get ahead of it.

A toast to the weapons of war, may they rust in peace.