I feel that if God had really wanted us to have enough oil, he would never have given us a Department of Energy.

I should warn you that underneath these clothes I'm wearing boxer shorts and I know how to use them.

Happiness is a very small desk and a very big wastebasket.

Remember the days when you let your child have some chocolate if he finished his cereal? Now, chocolate is one of the cereals.

I take my children everywhere, but they always find their way back home.

To exercise is human; not to is divine.

A sigh is an amplifier for people who suffer in silence.