If you can laugh together, you can work together.

There's so much pollution in the air now that if it weren't for our lungs there'd be no place to put it all.

To exercise is human; not to is divine.

I'm beginning to wonder about my broker. Yesterday I told him to buy a hundred shares of A.T.&T. He said, 'Would you spell that?'

A sigh is an amplifier for people who suffer in silence.

I had a terrible fight with my wife on New Year's Eve. She called me a procrastinator. So I finished addressing the Christmas cards and left.

The chance to be seen as a warm, witty guy is too good an opportunity for a politician to miss.