Most people would like to be delivered from temptation but would like it to keep in touch.

Do you realize that in the past sixty years, the only foreigners the French have been able to drive out are American tourists?

There's so much pollution in the air now that if it weren't for our lungs there'd be no place to put it all.

Sometimes I get the feeling the whole world is against me, but deep down I know that's not true. Some of the smaller countries are neutral.

Do your kids a favor - don't have any.

Did you hear about the woman who sent out 40,000 Valentine Cards doused in perfume and signed, "Guess Who?" She's a divorce lawyer.

Do you ever get the feeling that the only reason we have elections is to find out if the polls were right?