Women my age just don't turn me on. That's another problem with getting older. I took out an older woman the other night, and I mean old. I told her, Act your age. She died.
Rodney DangerfieldI once went out with this girl, she was no bargain either, she showed up with pigtails under her arms.
Rodney DangerfieldI said to a girl I'd been seeing, come home with me, honey, and I'll show you where it's at. She said, You'd better, because the last time I could'nt find it.
Rodney DangerfieldI tell ya, I was an ugly kid. I was so ugly that my dad kept the kid's picture that came with the wallet he bought.
Rodney Dangerfield