They say love thy neighbor as thy self , what am I supposed to do jerk him off too?

I asked him "Who said you could fool around with my wife" he said everybody.

She was so fat that her bathtub has stretch marks.

One time I went to a hotel. I asked the bellhop to handle my bag. He felt up my wife!

my wifes cooking is so bad the flys fix our screens

I was making love to my wife the other night, I looked up. She was on the phone.

I think my wife is cheating on me, the only thing the parrot knows how to say is, quick out the window.