I told my doctor I got water on my knee, he gave me a sponge and raised his fee!
One night I asked a cabbie to take me where the action is, he took me to my house.
He found a new way to cover up his bad breath. He holds up his arms.
Last year my birthday cake looked like a prairie fire.
My problem is that I appeal to everyone that can do me absolutely no good.
I knew a girl so ugly, she had a face like a saint-a Saint Bernard!