What a childhood I had, why, when I took my first step, my old man tripped me!
During sex, my girlfriend always wants to talk to me… Just the other night she called me from a hotel.
Comedy is a camouflage for depression.
I asked him "Who said you could fool around with my wife" he said everybody.
My son's an idiot. He sprained his ankle playing golf. He fell off the ballwasher.
Never guess your wife's size. Just buy anything marked petite and hold on to the receipt.