He who laughs last didn't get it in the first place.

My wife says 90% of sex occurs between the ears. But I need a girl who can blow more just my mind.

My golf game is getting real good. Last week, I got through the windmill.

My car broke down just the other day, I called triple A, they came and towed me away!

My wife's so dumb, she got a nail in the spare!!

My wife has to be the worst cook. I've got the only dog who begs for alka-seltzer.

Oh, this your wife, huh? A lovely lady. Hey baby, you must've been something before electricity.