They took a survey: Why do men get up in the middle of the night? Ten percent get up to go to the bathroom and 90 percent get up to go home.
Rodney DangerfieldI joined gamblers anon., they gave me 2 to 1 I wouldn't make it! I joined AA, there was a two drink minimum!
Rodney DangerfieldI came from a real tough neighborhood. Why, every time I shut the window I hurt somebody's fingers.
Rodney DangerfieldI come from a stupid family. My father worked in a bank. They caught him stealing pens.
Rodney Dangerfield