I once went out with this girl, she was no bargain either, she showed up with pigtails under her arms.
People seldom live up to their baby pictures.
My childhood was bad. No father. Mother was greedy and brought me up awful - never made me breakfast once. I don't want to get started. One story is worse than another.
She was so fat that her bathtub has stretch marks.
my wifes cooking is so bad the flys fix our screens
Time and tide and hookers wait for no man.