At certain times I like sex - like after a cigarette.
Boy what a hotel that was, why they stole my towel.
It's nice to be the best, but not when being the best brings out the worst in you.
To me, Viagra is the same as Disneyland. You wait an hour for a two-minute ride.
I'll tell ya, I don't get no respect... The other day, I got back from a business trip. I got in a cab and said to the driver, "Hey! Take me to where the action is!" So ya know where he took me? He took me to my house!
For two hours, some guy followed me around with a pooper scooper.