My wife is so fat that the last time I saw something that big it was grazing.
The shape I'm in, I could donate my body to science fiction.
I don't know kid, there are so many places they could hide.
I come from a stupid family. My father worked in a bank. They caught him stealing pens.
I bought a perfect second car... a tow truck.
When you walk up five flights of stairs at four in the morning, there's definitely a hooker involved.