My wife is so fat that when she lays on the beach the people feel sorry for her and try to roll her back into the water.
He found a new way to cover up his bad breath. He holds up his arms.
I once met a beautiful, proper English girl. I bid her adieu.... she bid me a don't.
At my age I'm envious of a stiff wind.
I figured out I'm bisexual. I have sex twice a year.
She was so ugly that I took her to a dog show and she won first prize.