I tell ya, gambling never agreed with me. Last week I went to the track and they shot my horse with the opening gun.
Rodney DangerfieldI took my son to Coney island, I said "wanna go in the crazy house?", he said "save your money we'll be home soon"!
Rodney DangerfieldThe sign on the bar said: 'girls- topless, bottomless', I went inside and there was nobody there!
Rodney Dangerfield