Women my age just don't turn me on. That's another problem with getting older. I took out an older woman the other night, and I mean old. I told her, Act your age. She died.

I stuck my head out the window and got arrested for mooning.

My wife's so dumb, she got a nail in the spare!!

They say love thy neighbor as thy self , what am I supposed to do jerk him off too?

I went to look for a used car and found my wife's dress in the back seat.

I like southern girls. They talk so slow that by the time they say no, I made it already.

my wifes cooking is so bad the flys fix our screens