When I was a kid I got no respect. I had no friends. I remember the see-saw. I had to keep runnin' from one end to the other.
If beauty is in the eye of the beholder, so is ugliness.
Never tell your wife she's bad in bed. She'll go out and get a second opinion.
Hey, did somebody step on a duck?
At Christmas time we couldn't afford tinsel, so we'd wait till grandpa sneezed.
Life's a short trip. You'll find out.