Once I opened up a fortune cookie and inside was the guy's cheque next to me I said hey buddy I got your cheque he said thanks.

I've learned to control everything. I don't get angry at anything. Somebody can do me wrong. That's life. What good is it to get angry?

Me and my dad used to play tag, he'd drive!

I come from a stupid family. My uncle heard that most deaths occurs within ten miles of the house...so he moved.

I tell ya, it's tough to save a buck. Right now I'm supporting two fighters. My wife and her mother.

I joined gamblers anon., they gave me 2 to 1 I wouldn't make it! I joined AA, there was a two drink minimum!

Oh, when I was a kid in show business I was poor. I used to go to orgies to eat the grapes.