I'm not a sexy guy. I went to a hooker. I dropped my pants. She dropped her price.
I told my doctor I think my wife has VD. He gave himself a shot of penicillin.
He who laughs last didn't get it in the first place.
A sense of humor is rare. It isn't telling a joke about how there are three ways to get to heaven. It's being in a restaurant and hearing someone say, Everyone's got their tale of woe, and then turning around and saying, Unfortunately, in life, there's more woe than tail.
At Christmas time we couldn't afford tinsel, so we'd wait till grandpa sneezed.
I live in a bad neighborhood. Why, I saw two complete strangers share a taxi - yeah, one guy took the radio and the other guy took the tires.