I have nothing but troubles with my car. Every Sunday I take my family out for a push.
My wife's so dumb, she got a nail in the spare!!
At my age I'm envious of a stiff wind.
I get no respect... I tell you, when I was born, the doctor smacked my mother
I'm a bad lover. Once I caught a peeping tom booing me.
With my old man I got no respect. He told me never take candy from a stranger unless he offered me a ride.