Time and tide and hookers wait for no man.
When I was born the doctor took one look at my face, turned me over and said, "Look, twins!"
My cousin is gay, in school while other kids were dissecting frog, he was opening flies.
I don't know kid, there are so many places they could hide.
I was a poster child... for birth control!
With my old man I got no respect. When he took me hunting he gave me a three minute head start. Then on the way home he tied me to the fender and put the deer in the car.