Don't talk about yourself so much...we'll do that when you leave.
Sure I smoked pot in hospital. My wife won't let me toke at home.
The shape I'm in, I could donate my body to science fiction.
Once I pulled a job, I was so stupid. I picked a guy's pocket on an airplane and made a run for it.
My wife a great driver, she once hit a deer. It was in a zoo. There is a pair of shoes on the dashboard. They belong to the last guy she hit
I've been writing jokes since I'm fifteen. Not out of happiness, but to go to a different place, because reality wasn't good to me.