His breath is so bad why every time he smokes he blows onion rings.

Everyone gets their rough day. No one gets a free ride. Today so far, I had a good day. I got a dial tone.

There's only one thing wrong with my wife's face - it shows.

Getting older is tough. I remember the last time I felt an erection. It was at the movies. The only trouble is, it belonged to the guy sitting next to me.

Boy is my wife stupid. It takes her and hour and a half to watch 60 minutes. My daughters no bargain either. In public school she was voted most likely to conceive.

His breath is so bad why every time he smokes he blows onion rings.

I'm not a hypochondriac, but my gynaecologist firmly believes I am.