My wife only has sex with me for a purpose. Last night it was to time an egg.
Life is full of temporary situations, ultimately ending in a permanent solution.
My wife is so fat that the last time I saw something that big it was grazing.
His breath is so bad why every time he smokes he blows onion rings.
People ask if I can get it up in the morning. I tell them are you kidding I'm envious of a stiff wind.
I tell ya when I fly, I don't get no respect. I took one of those cheap flights, no frills. I finished eatin' and had to do the dishes.