The sign on the bar said: 'girls- topless, bottomless', I went inside and there was nobody there!
My daughters been picked up so many times she's starting to grow handles
My wife only has sex with me for a purpose. Last night it was to time an egg.
...went to a bar for a few drinks. The bartender asked what I wanted. "Surprise me", I said. So he showed me a naked picture of my wife.
My dog learned how to beg by watching me through the bedroom door.
You can name your own salary in this business. I call mine Fred.