I think my wife is cheating on me, the only thing the parrot knows how to say is, quick out the window.

I was making love to my wife the other night, I looked up. She was on the phone.

They say love thy neighbor as thy self , what am I supposed to do jerk him off too?

The sign on the bar said: 'girls- topless, bottomless', I went inside and there was nobody there!

My cousin is gay, in school while other kids were dissecting frog, he was opening flies.

I tell ya, I don't get no respect ... Last week, my wife told me that she was going to cut me down to twice a month. But I thought about it, and I figured that it wasn't too bad. I know a couple of guys that she cut out completely.

I walked in on my wife and the milkman, the first thing she says is "don't tell the butcher"!