School is a place were you go to eat your lunch

I'm not a sexy guy. I went to a hooker. I dropped my pants. She dropped her price.

I shouldn't tell jokes about my wife. she's attached to a machine that keeps her alive... The refrigerator.

Man, who don't like spaghetti?

I tell ya, I was an ugly kid. I was so ugly that my dad kept the kid's picture that came with the wallet he bought.

A travel agent told I could spend 7 nights in HAWAII no days just nights.

With girls I get no respect. A belly dancer told me I turned her stomach.