I don't get no respect, no respect at all!

They say love thy neighbor as thy self , what am I supposed to do jerk him off too?

I went to a gay bar, they wanted proof of sex so I showed them, they said it wasn't enough.

When I was kidnapped as a child my parents sent a letter to the hijackers me Pay 5,000 dollars or your back

I figured out I'm bisexual. I have sex twice a year.

People ask if I can get it up in the morning. I tell them are you kidding I'm envious of a stiff wind.

I like southern girls. They talk so slow that by the time they say no, I made it already.