You know you're old when your family talk about you in front of you. What are we going to do with Pop? We have company tonight.
My wife she's fat. Why, if she lost a few pounds, she'd be perfectly round.
I told my doctor I think my wife has VD. He gave himself a shot of penicillin.
A travel agent told I could spend 7 nights in HAWAII no days just nights.
Sure I smoked pot in hospital. My wife won't let me toke at home.
When I was born I brought no joy, my father said he wanted a boy!