I recently had double-bypass surgery. As they wheel you in, the doctor always gives you a last look. You know that look. That look of confidence to make you feel good. I always say to every doctor, If I don't make it, I'll never know it.
Rodney DangerfieldI got my first break and became a singing waiter at eighteen or nineteen. I couldn't make a living at it. I quit. Then I got married and sold aluminum siding. My wife had problems physically. It was not good.
Rodney DangerfieldI once dated a girl that was wild. She was so wild that one night she gave her phone number to the mechanical bull.
Rodney DangerfieldI had a date with an inflatable girl. Now I got an inflatable guy looking for me.
Rodney Dangerfield