I told my dentist I want a tooth to match the others. He gave my one with four cavities.
Rodney DangerfieldI'm at an age where I think more about food than I do about sex. Last week I put a mirror over my dining room table.
Rodney DangerfieldAfter I got divorced, I said to myself, I will never, ever get married again. It was in cement. I went through a really rough twenty-five years, but it happened again. I fell in love. I told her, Baby, I don't want a prenuptial agreement. This is it. Everyone told me I was nuts. Well, my new wife and I are married six years and we get along great. You can make anything work if you're both givers.
Rodney Dangerfield