Life is full of temporary situations, ultimately ending in a permanent solution.

I told my wife a man is like wine, he gets better with age. She locked me in the cellar.

I bought a perfect second car... a tow truck.

What a dog I got. Last night he went on the paper four times - three while I was reading it.

When my old man wanted sex, my mother would show him a picture of me.

During sex, my girlfriend always wants to talk to me… Just the other night she called me from a hotel.

My mother used to rock me - and she used big rocks.