I did not climb to the top of the food chain to eat carrots.

I've never been one to look up the ladder. I've always looked down the ladder. As long as there's one guy down there, I'm fine.

Barbara was actually Jeff Foxworthy's interior designer when we first met. So, not only was Jeff responsible for my success in my career, he also introduced me to the woman who I'm going to spend the rest of my life with, which, I think, makes us even.

I'd rather do a really good small part than a really bad big part.

Anybody could say anything they want about me, and it literally never penetrates my skin.

If life gives you lemons, you should make lemonade. And try to find somebody who's life gives them vodka, and have a party.

In Texas, we have the death penalty, and we use it. That's right. If you come to Texas and kill somebody, we will kill you back.