It would be useless to bomb Washington. If you destroy one building, they already have two other buildings completely staffed with people doing exactly the same thing.

Democracy means doing whatever you want without asking permission of anybody but your boss, your doctor, your lawyer, your landlord, your bank, your city, your state and federal authorities, and your wife and children.

The longest word in the world is "a word from our sponsor."

Our toaster has two settings: too soon or too late.

It was on my fifth birthday that Papa put his hand on my shoulder and said, 'Remember, my son, if you ever need a helping hand, you'll find one at the end of your arm.'

Somewhere on this globe, every ten seconds, there is a woman giving birth to a child. She must be found and stopped.

One of the virtues of being very young is that you don't let the facts get in the way of your imagination.