Strippers should be role-models for little girls. If only for the fact that they wax their assholes.

People say, like, "I love when you smile because part of your mouth goes up," then I never organically smile again.

I commend you on all you've done for PETA, wrestling the one-eyed trouser snake with your bare hands, gently cuddling it in your arms, and nurturing it back to health.

Growing up, I always loved Disney movies, but the first movie I remember seeing is 'Sleepers,' so I wasn't really taken to children's movies.

By the time I would have graduated, at 22, I was a writer and featured performer on Saturday Night Live.

I don't wanna be labeled as straight or labeled as gay. I just want people to look at me and see me as white.

I tend to be more arrogant on stage. Far more ignorant. I sometimes say what I think and sometimes say the opposite of what I think and the lines get blurred, but I can only hope that some kind of absolute power transcends.