I don't care if you think I'm racist. I just want you to think I'm thin.

In the '80s especially, a lot of comedians felt compelled to stick with what made them famous and those people became caricatures.

Some things are just for private. It's like people thinking I'm cold or this or that. It's unfortunate, but I don't need strangers to know that I'm warm. I don't need strangers to know the real me.

In the big picture, life has a gap in it. It just does. You don't go crazy trying to fill it.

I think the difference between being miserable and finding happiness is just a matter of perspective. If you live your life defining yourself by what other people think of you, it's a form of self-torture.

The audience works as such a mob. They either all laugh or all don't laugh, and, you know, changes from audience to audience.

Jews, black people - any people who are hated or who have suffered, either as individuals or as a people - use humour. It is a survival skill.