I had several different bosses during the early years of 'Dilbert.' They were all pretty sure I was mocking someone else.

Never base your budget requests on realistic assumptions, as this could lead to a decrease in your funding.

I should have written that down. - Dilbert

The best part about being my age is in knowing how my life worked out.

A person with a flexible schedule and average resources will be happier than a rich person who has everything except a flexible schedule. Step one in your search for happiness is to continually work toward having control of your schedule.

Have you ever noticed that things that don’t kill you make you weaker? And great minds don’t think alike. If they did, the patent office would only have about fifty inventions. I started getting suspicious when I cried over spilt milk and the cashier took it off my bill.” - Wally

You already barely exist. Disappearing entirely won't be that much of a change.