When virtual reality gets cheaper than dating, society is doomed.

He was deader than a shrunken head at a Hackey Sack festival.

Failure is a resource that can be managed.

Science is a good thing. News reporters are good things too. But it's never a good idea to put them in the same room.

A matador is a guy who didn't have enough people skills to be promoted to serial killer.

As a fan, I'm distraught, but as a cartoonist looking at new vacant spaces in 2400 newspapers, well, behind me, my cats are dancing a conga line.

I should have written that down. - Dilbert