My father, OK, when we first got old enough to hunt, this was his rule: If you shoot it, you come home and eat it. Otherwise you do not shoot it, OK? You don't just kill something for the sake of killing it, OK? If you kill it, you gotta grill it, so to speak.

One time, hey, in high school this girl told me, hey, its not you, its me.. Ofcourse its you, you dang HEFFER!

People don't realize where unsweet tea came from. During the war they had to ration sugar, so then everybody just had to drink bitter tea, or unsweet.

We killed our own hogs, we killed our own beef, we raised our own vegetables, which Mama canned. We did live off the land.

They got some people that are saying, hey, elect me as president. Hey, Washington couldn't handle Si Robertson. Trust me.

Everybody when they saw it, they said, "Did Willie Nelson sign your hat?" I'd say, "No, that'd be Willie Knucklehead - Robertson, OK?" We were at an event for the fans and I took my hat off and set it down on the couch, and he signed it. I said, "What are you doing, idiot?" He said, "Look, I was in the zone, and you just happened to put your hat in my zone."

I don’t know any redneck that’s not into fun. That’s their middle name: Red-Fun-Neck.