I spent many years laughing at Harry Secombe's singing until somebody told me that it wasn't a joke.

My Father had a profound influence on me. He was a lunatic.

Blessed are the cracked, for they let in the light

We don't have anything planned, so nothing can go wrong.

Education isn't everything, for a start it isn't an elephant

In India a farmhand was caught in the act with his cow. He said he had bad eyesight and thought it was his wife.

Contraceptives should be used on every conceivable occasion.