Aristocrats have heirs; the poor have children; the rest keep dogs.

This silent call you make, A silence so loud I fear the world knows it's meaning If you fill every corner of a room Where can I look? If I close my eyes the silence becomes louder! There is no escape from you The only way out is in

In India a farmhand was caught in the act with his cow. He said he had bad eyesight and thought it was his wife.

Its all in the mind, you know.

I'm a hero with coward's legs.

Never return to a doctor whose office plants have died. After five days in hospital, I took a turn for the nurse.

Only on the third class tourist class passengers' deck was it a sultry overcast morning, but then if you do things on the cheap you must expect these things.