I have got so low that I have asked to be hospitalized and for deep narcosis (sleep). I cannot stand being awake. The pain is too much... Something has happened to me, this vital spark has stopped burning - I go to a dinner table now and I don't say a word, just sit there like a dodo. Normally I am the centre of attention, keeps the conversation going, - so that is depressing in itself. It's like another person taking over, very strange. The most important thing I say is 'good evening' and then I go quiet.

I shook hands with a friendly Arab. I still have my right arm to prove it.

You can fool some of the people all of the time, and all the people some of the time, which is just long enough to be president of the United States.

Life is a long agonized illness only curable by death.

I have the body of an eighteen year old. I keep it in the fridge.

Contraceptives should be used on every conceivable occasion.

I told you I was ill. (On his headstone)